PROBLEM #1 - TWILIGHT

WHAT'S COOLER THAN BEING COOL...EDWARD CULLEN

Jen
OK

TO BEGIN WITH

they don’t even know each other and from the second they see each other they are like SWEET BALLS IM SO IN LOVE. who straight away falls in love with some creepy pasty cold guy that has no friends and keeps to himself

5:21pmCaitlin
isnt that how you fell in love with me....?

and its not straight away they arent in love like IMMEDIATELY

they have to sit through like 10 biology classes before they realise it

5:21pmJen
no i fell in love with you cause u were mz new booty dickheaaaaaaaaaad not cause u were a creepy pasty vampire.......ALTHOUGH

oh yeah thats right they have to like swap partners bc edward jizzed in his pants with bella too much

5:22pmCaitlin
there is a whole introduction to the book you dont open up the first page and its liek BAM ZOOMMMGGGG BELLA 4 EDWARD FOOOO LYYYFF XOXOX

5:22pmJen
fuck the book I AINT NO FOUR EYEZ

5:23pmCaitlin
they hang out heaps.. and i mean yes he might be physically cold... but his heart is warm.. warm with looooveeee

5:23pmJen
... and w.t.f. that douche ‘bella’ had sex with eddiebebez, she was cold, got bruises all over her, she got knocked up, the baby ATE IT’S WAY OUT OF HER FUCKING STOMACH and all she could say was ... ‘marry me, and please make me a fucking creepy vampire like you please babe’

i dont know about u but thats not a normal reaction to a feotus eating out of your uterus

5:23pmCaitlin
they get married BEFORE he beats her up during sex

5:23pmJen

OH SHIT

5:23pmCaitlin
and SOME PEOPLE like that kindof stuff.... kinkaaaayy

5:24pmJen

WASNT AWARE OF THAT FACT... and ew caitlin.......dirty bitch.. is that what u did with


shit i keep forgetting we're posting this

5:24pmCaitlin
and maybe if you had actually READ THE BOOKS you would know that bella doesnt mind if the baby eats its way out of her womb

5:25pmJen

I READ THE 2ND BOOK THINKING IT WAS THE FIRST THANK U VERY MUCHOS

5:25pmCaitlin
as long as it survives

5:25pmJen

the 2nd book was just as fecked

5:25pmCaitlin
.....no wonder you dropped out of uni

5:25pmJen
the second book is all like her being like OMG MY DREAMS EDWARDDDD... but it’s ok im building a bike with that douchebag. like SHUTUPPPPPPPPP

hey.. i dropped out of uni bc of a completly unrelated drug problem

5:26pmCaitlin
oh thats right... my mistake

5:26pmJen
get it right get it tight cacks

5:26pmCaitlin
yeah the second book is the worst out of all four so i aint disagreeing with u there guurl!!

5:26pmJen

OMG I FORGOT MY MAIN POINT


BELLAS A FUCKING PEDO


edward never gets old hey... but she does the old bitch isnt she like 17 but he still looks like 16 or some shit????

5:26pmCaitlin
what! hooow??

edward is the one who is 90 years older than her

not the other way round

5:27pmJen
but he doesnt look it???

man this book is fucked.

5:27pmCaitlin
yeah coz he is IMMORTAL

its not that hard of a concept to grasp jen IF YOU JUST GAVE IT A CHANCE

he doesnt age coz hes a vampire

fuck

5:28pmJen
but like...... fuck this book man

5:28pmCaitlin
have you even read them all?

5:28pmJen
why do u want to read about vampires... id much rather read about people babysitting


babysitters club? no... SHUTUP

5:28pmCaitlin
oh yeah thats a really good argument ... "fuck this book mannnnnn"

why would i want to READ about babysitting? i babysit all the fucking time its not that GREAT

5:29pmJen
no that fucking movie... what is it called again.. when a stranger calls

5:29pmCaitlin
......how is this even related?

5:29pmJen

this crazy guy comes to kill in her aquarium

5:29pmCaitlin
where are u going with this

you are so fucked in the head

5:29pmJen
ILL KILL U IN THE AQUARIUM

5:30pmCaitlin
STAY ON THE TOPIC

5:30pmJen
id rather straddle someone with lesions on their body than talk about twilight some more

5:30pmCaitlin
thats because your a slut

5:31pmJen
i wasnt going to bring this up... but... YESTERDAY WHEN I WAS DYING CAITLINS HAIR SHE TRIPPED ON THE HAIRDRYER AND FELL ON THE GROUND AND LIKE HOPPED AROUND AND THEN FINALLY COLLAPSED ON THE FLOOR

....we should end this before it gets to long and too hectic... and i start whipping out the big guns

5:33pmCaitlin
bahahahahahha duuude i have WAAY more shit on you than u have me

none which is suitable/legal to be posted

5:33pmJen

THIS ENDS NOW!